24/7 Expectations... and Grace

 

“The people were looking for him and when they came to where he was, they tried to keep him from leaving them. But he said, “I must preach the good news of the kingdom of God to the other towns also, because that is why I was sent” (Luke 4:42b-43).

 

I wonder if Jesus would have had data service to His phone. I recently disabled my service. I realized that I do not have the self-control needed to be present with people and be opened up to 24/7 access to data. I am trying to figure out how to be with people in love and compulsive checking was getting in the way of this sense of call.

 

In the above verse “the people were looking for him”, but he left them to follow his call. He intentionally refused to meet their expectations. “The people were looking for him”, but the work was outside of his Father’s call, so he fought. He was present with people when he was called to be, yet self-controlled and single-minded enough in his pursuit of his Father’s business to leave them when he needed to.

 

If Jesus had data service, he would have had the self-control to manage it. Pressing matters do not throw him off from being both fully present with people and fully responsive to the Father’s call. Whether this meant seemingly ignoring the sick and dying, just waitin’ around with the woman at the well, or telling one of his best friends, “Get behind me Satan”, he persisted in his sense of what he needed to do - regardless of the expectations others placed on him.

 

How do we hold the balance of the competing 24/7 expectations of: friends, family, work, church, sports and hobbies, when it’s so easy for one piece of our lives to throw us off balance?

 

I have heard it said, we ought not refer to this as a balance, but rather as a tension. Using the language of balance seems to infer that we can perfectly situate the competing demands, but we never will. If the Kingdom is unfolding and the Father’s business is developing, then our call and our responsibilities are also shifting.

 

I had a recent conversation with a 1st year student who decided to drop down to four courses so she could be fully present with the people around her. I had another conversation with a staff member who had to pull out of a church committee to follow the calling of God on her life. There is grace for those of us who are still figuring out how to manage the expectations and roles we are in. 24/7 expectations create tension. To live faithfully in the tension of shifting responsibilities and expectations, you must be willing to give yourself grace.

 

“The people were looking for him”, but He still left them. When the expectations were high, he took the freedom to remove himself from situations and recalculate his call: “Jesus often withdrew to lonely places and prayed” (Luke 5:16). To follow God’s calling, to be about your Father’s business, whose needs or expectations might you be called to take note of but not accommodate to?

 

Talk to someone about this struggle; you are not alone.

 

The roots of a strong tree draw from living water for sturdiness and growth.

 

 

Rooted for the Marathon

Blessed is the one…whose delight is in the law of the Lord, and who meditates on his law day and night. That person is like a tree planted by streams of water, which yields its fruit in season and whose leaf does not wither— whatever they do prospers (Psalm 1: 1-3, excerpts)

Following Jesus is not a 100 meter sprint that we run when we’re in the mood.

It’s a lifelong marathon.

Today inaugurates the final week of September, and the first school day of autumn. We’ve had the first Church in the Box, Hotspot, three chapels, dorm devos, impromptu porch worship experiences, and all kinds of other September experiences.

And now it’s time to fasten our laces for the marathon. Marathons beat us up: we get tired and cranky, and our faith goes stale, our love cools down, our hope lowers its bar to wishful thinking.

What sustains us for this long haul? Prayer is the chief marathon-equipper.

When the race overwhelms me, one of my strategies is to turn the testimony quoted below into a personal prayer. I invite you to try it right now, addressing it to the Lord as a petition:

“As a believer in Jesus Christ, I see myself as redeemed, forgiven and covered in the righteousness of Jesus Christ. I believe that this is how God sees me, all the time and without exception. I believe that his smile and delight in me is unwavering. This view of myself is quite simple yet with profound implications. It allows me to accept criticism without self-condemnation and to accept affirmations without exalting myself. This is the ideal view of myself that I am always working at. It is a struggle, but a good one.” (Carol Collier, quoted in the New York Times, May 3, 2013).

This Wednesday at noon we begin our annual Redeemer tradition of 24/7 prayer: 168 consecutive hours of praying in the AUG hall common room. This Redeemer tradition symbolizes our shift from the early September sprint to the full year marathon. I encourage you – either alone or with others – to sign up for an hour outside the Student Senate office. If the thought of praying for an hour scares you, I assure you that the room will invite you to pray in so many different ways that your hour will fly by.

Last night Dr. Jim Payton, one of the senior members of our community (and thus a spiritual marathon runner) addressed us at Church in the Box. This Wednesday another marathon runner – one who has been imprisoned for his faith and activism in Communist China -- will address us in chapel. Han Dongfang will share his testimony to help us launch 24/7 prayer week under the title, “Why I am one of the five luckiest people in the world.” (He will also give a public address Tuesday evening.)

How can a persecuted brother in the Lord be one of the five luckiest people in the world?

Maybe he’s a tree planted by the stream of living water, nourished for the marathon.

May the Lord strengthen you as his tree this week too.

Rooted in Community: A context for mourning.

What struck me, in the aftermath of the tragic passing of Eric Kippers, were the levels of engagement that our community had with grief in general and with Eric in particular. For some of those in our community, Eric’s loss is like an amputation. Fresh, powerful, immediate…. For others, it has been more empathetic, in that their hearts went out to those they know who are affected and the realization of what Eric’s family, friends and surrounding community are feeling. And for yet others, there is a vague bewilderment regarding what all the fuss is about. It doesn’t touch their world. Talk of grief does not connect with their own emotional vocabulary. Not their pain…. Not their issue…. 

In the last half of Romans 12, the apostle Paul issues what could be considered a bullet point list of does and don’ts for living the Christian life rooted in community. Verse 15 states “ Rejoice with those who rejoice. Mourn with those who mourn”. There is a whole lot more to this verse than first meets the eye.

What does it actually mean to mourn with those who mourn? What does it mean to make someone else’s pain your own? What does it mean to enter into someone else’s suffering and to identify with it, even if you know that you have no idea what it is actually like?

As one of my colleagues wryly quipped recently “It is so much easier being shallow… “.

There is much that could be said and written. Here is a very short list.

·  Be there. They are not looking for answers. Not really. Probably not from you, anyway. They are just looking for you.

·   Listen. Invite them to talk about their loved one.

·   Be patient. Be ok with pain that you can’t relieve or take away.

·   Be ok with messy.

·   Did I mention patience? Grow in patience. We often want the grieving person ‘to get on with it’ more for our benefit than for theirs.

·   Allow for pain and anger – however misplaced.

·   It’s not a broken record. It is a long road up a mountain, complete with switchbacks.

·   It’s not about you. Be ok with the person not wanting to talk about it right then.

Grief is powerful, random and bewildering. God has ordained mourning ( the tangible expression of grief) as a pathway through it. And He has placed us in community. Biblical community is the God ordained context in which mourning can be properly done. I would actually be bold enough to suggest that the ability of a community to allow mourning and create a healing environment in which those who grieve can heal and grow is an indicator of its maturity, and even its legitimacy. I would be even more bold to suggest that it is true at the level of the individual, as well.

Eric’s tragic passing is a powerful learning opportunity . As I mentioned in Chapel, it is in response to such tragedies that the Body of Christ rises to its magnificent best. After identifying my son’s body in the morgue, a grief counselor cornered me and asked me if I had any support. Support….? I told him right then and there “Man, you have no idea..” But as it turned out, neither did I. Christ’s community was simply incredible!

And we are all part of it.